English Couple Decides to Bike in Iran: How Stupid Can Crooks be?

English couple arrested as they travel through Iran on a motorbike ride


Look at their silly faces: Craig and Lindsay Foreman were biking in Iran at the worst time possible in recent history and against the advice of their own government. How stupid can some people be? They look like a profitable investment in the Iranian Foreign Hostage Fund.

Apparently, they were heading to Australia for a "positive psychology" conference. Unfortunately they might have to be trained in daily seminars in "very negative psychotherapy" by their Iranian jailers, including wearing the veil for Mrs. Foreman and growing a beard for Mr. Foreman.

Mrs. Foreman, a "life coach" with a doctorate in psychology, and Mr Foreman, a carpenter, were planning on reaching Australia, but were detained last month after they crossed into Iran from Armenia. I would never hire an idiot as a life coach because I'd be on the receiving end of very bad and potentially deadly advice.

Now, their family did not reveal anything new by saying that they are in a “distressing situation”. The numskull couple, in their early 50s, have been showing their wherebaouts and travels on social media, to facilitate their location and detention by the Iranian "International Friendly Hostage Kidnappers" arm of the Islamic government.

Typical of condescending westerners who bend over backwards to lick the boots of people they fundamentally disagree with, Mrs. Foreman said she was “having an amazing time” in Iran while Mr. Foreman described “lovely people” in a “lovely country”. They are about to have painfully amazing times and meet friendly people in the intimacy of the Iranian slammer.

Photographs released by the Englsih government show the husband and wife meeting Hugo Shorter, former English ambassador to Lebanon and now to Iran, at the Public and Revolutionary Prosecutor’s Office in Kerman.

The stupid couple were aware of foreign office advice not to visit Iran. “Yes, we’re aware of the risks,” the "doctor in psychology" wrote on social media. “But we also know the rewards of meeting incredible people, hearing their stories, and seeing the breathtaking landscapes of these regions could far outweigh the fear.” Naturally, they will be meeting incredible jailers and prison guards, and see breathtaking landscapes of Iranian toilets and prison wards. They will also give a major headache to their government as it tries to make a deal with the ayatollahs which might include exchanging them for detained Iranian terrorists in England, or reducing UK sanctions on Iran, or even making concessions to Iranian terrorist arms in the region like Hezbollah in Lebanon.

The English government has reiterated its advice to its nationals to avoid all travel to Iran. But some adults have the brains of ten-years old and don't listen to advice.

The Foremans will now join the club of European nationals in Iranian detention, collectively known as CRETINS (Candidate Reclacitrant Europeans To Iran Incarceration). The New Age-Primitive Persian fusion nation known as the Islamic Republic has been known to seize stupidly heroic dual and foreign nationals as hostages to be traded in prisoner swaps or otherwise bartered for concessions from their home countries.