Israel is the new Silicon Valley.... Meanwhile in Lebanon....

While Israel and the Arab Gulf states are building and developing, all the brains and the education in Lebanon are going down the toilet because the Lebanese are still determined to "resist" - thanks to Hezbollah - against the "conspiracy" that is constantly being plotted against them. In fact, the genius Lebanese believe that all these enemies around them and around the globe (from Israel to Syria, and Turkey and the United States....) are constantly plotting against them to prevent them from becoming the next Silicon Valley or the Einsteins of their times.

You see, the Lebanese are so smart that the world is terrified of them and of the competition they would pose in the world's economy. Therefore, it goes without saying that the failure of Lebanon and of the Lebanese people to have a functional country with electricity, running water, reliable phone and Internet, paved roads, laws that are enforced, decent public transportation, etc... (i.e. all the normal things that normal civilized countries have), is not due to the stupidity of the Lebanese. No, far from it. It is due to Israel and Syria and the US and Europe and Saudi Arabia and Egypt and all the enemies of Lebanon around the world who fear the genius of the Lebanese so much that they all plot and conspire to keep the Lebanese from achieving their true potential....

And so, the Lebanese, thank God and thank Iran, have a genius named Hassan Zoballah who runs an organization called Fuckallah, and he and his organization now run the government, thankfully, to "resist" the conspiracy and finally bring Lebanon to its true potential, which is to basically run the world and control the destiny of history. At long last, the Lebanese can now, with Tizallah at the helm, justifiably brag to the world what a great country they have. It really is not about electricity, roads, crime, running water, corruption, garbage, pollution, rape of the environment, discrimination against women, rule of backward religion.... No, none of these things really matters. What matters is that the Lebanese and Lebanon are smart and great and wonderful.... And it is all these other enemies that is keeping us from demonstrating our genius, our wonder and our smartness....

With Zeballlah's 50,000 missiles (and who is counting anymore? Syria is currently transferring its entire arsenal to Lebanon because the Syrian regime, another fantastic proof of Arab genius, is about to collapse), I am no longer afraid. I now know that the world will soon recognize me as the genius that I am, under my five decaying cedar trees, with garbage up to my ears, without water and electricity, and without the Internet, along my polluted coastline, and with all the asses I have to kiss and all the bribes I have to pay every time I need a paper from the government. This is indeed the best environment for business.... and all we need to do is "confront" the enemies and all will be grand.

Oh, and by the way, while we still haggle over who killed Hariri and whether Gebran Ras-Ayri Bassil will be minister of toilets or minister of sewers.... Israel and Cyprus have finished siphoning off all the natural gas we share with them in the Mediterranean. Well, it's not our fault. We have all these enemies plotting against us, but they (Israel and Cyprus) have no such enemies plotting and conspiring against them, and that is why they have no Hezbollah resistance to manage. And we do. But soon, with Hezbollah and Miqati and Michel Sleiman in Power, all our problems are solved, and we should soon prove to the world our genius and what smart asses we are...

Hanibaal

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With a concentration of start-ups just behind that of Silicon Valley and an impressive pool of engineers, Israel is becoming the new standard for high-tech, with a unique business model.
Internet-related activities contributed 9 billion euros (12.6 billion dollars) to the Israeli economy in 2009, representing 6.5 percent of GDP, according to a report from management consultancy McKinsey.
The sector is worth more than the construction industry (5.4 percent of GDP) and almost as much as health (6.8 percent).
The web economy has also created a total of 120,000 jobs, accounting for 4 percent of the country's workforce, McKinsey says.
From Microsoft to Intel through Google, IBM and Philips, almost all the giants of the Internet and technology have set up important research and development centres in Israel, spawning products and systems used worldwide.
"Israel is the country with the most engineers in its population, and it ranks second behind the United States in the number of companies listed on Nasdaq," said David Kadouch, product manager at Google Israel, which opened its R&D operation in 2007 and currently has 200 employees.